The role of the caregiver

There are many different types of caregiving, and you may find yourself in one or more of these roles at different times in the health journey of your loved one. 
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Over 53 million people were providing unpaid care in the U.S. in 2020 according to AARP.

You may not have imagined yourself in the role of caregiver. But you aren’t alone. Often this care comes with new responsibilities and very little education or training. Whether you’ve officially been asked by a loved one to be a caregiver or find yourself becoming a primary caregiver without a formal conversation, you’ve been tasked with both a rewarding and challenging role.

Types of caregiving

There are a lot of different types of caregiving, and you may find yourself in one or more of these roles at different times in the health journey of your loved one. The Caregiver Action Network describes four basic types of caregivers: 

  • Crisis caregivers: Those thrust suddenly into the role by acute illness or emergency.
  • Long-term caregivers: Those taking care of someone with a chronic illness or dementia, for example.
  • Long-distance caregivers: Those daughters, sons and others who live far away yet both feel and are responsible for care.
  • Sandwiched caregivers: Those who have other full-time obligations such as a demanding job or young children, so are especially pressed for time.

You may fall into multiple categories of caregiver and one role can and often does turn into another over time. 

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Caregiving can also take on a variety of activities such as:

  • Direct care includes physical and emotional support and help with daily tasks
  • Maintaining the immediate living environment, including cleaning and bill payment
  • Nurturing personal connections—communicating, inviting, and facilitating contact
  • Administrative help —such as time spent dealing with insurance companies, doctors’ office visits and prescription management
  • Self-care for the patient – helping them take the best care of themselves

Tips for getting started as a caregiver 

Here are some simple, practical suggestions to get started adapted from CaringInfo.org:

Understand, as best you can, what is being asked of you and how you can respond. Be sure to reassess from time to time as situations change. You may want to set up a regular weekly and/or daily time to talk with your loved one about how they're feeling at that time, and what they need from you.
You can find online and in-person support groups for most situations—it can help a lot to speak to others going through the same thing. They will give support and share wisdom.
Start writing down things! Lists such as questions for the doctor, what help is needed, etc. will help. Then you can start to prioritize needs and determine who can help with what.
Yes, you – the caregiver – should be open to asking for help. Do you know people who are good with finances? Have family members who enjoy cooking or have time to run errands? With the permission and input of the patient, enlist other family and friends to assist with specific tasks. This shares the load and allows you to be a better caretaker.

Find palliative care

Learn about palliative care services in your area.